Content in All Things
Content
/kənˈtent/
noun, adjective
Definition of content:
1: to make yourself accept something as satisfactory, although it could be better
2: pleased with your situation and not needing or desiring it to be better
I’ve heard it said over the past few weeks that COVID-19 is “the great equalizer,” affecting everyone the same regardless of their demographic or socioeconomic status. But let’s be honest, who hasn’t seen a few celebrity quarantine posts and thought, “They’re having a better pandemic than me?” Even during a quarantine, we run the risk of comparing our situation to someone else’s—even if that comparison is to see who’s doing isolation better. Now, I’ll be the first to admit, I’ve spent my fair share of time looking over the fence to see how green the neighbor’s grass is. And I mean figuratively too (boredom is starting to take its toll). There’s just something very tempting about wanting what others have—material or otherwise. But such longing comes at a cost. Mark Twain once said, “Comparison is the death of joy”—a steep price to pay, especially in times like these.
But what happens when the comparison isn’t between “us and them,” but rather between “us and ourselves”? That is, what if we find ourselves spending an unhealthy amount of time longing for the greener grass we had in the past? In such cases, comparison remains a threat to joy. However, unlike “us/them-comparisons,” “us/ourselves-comparisons” are less easily ignored. They’re like family members with nowhere to go. Left unchecked, we may find ourselves simultaneously envious of the life we had and dissatisfied with the life we have. So, how do we defend against this?
If comparison is the death of joy, then it’s reasonable to suggest that contentedness is its life-source. But how do we accept something as satisfactory when we know it could be improved? How can we be okay with worse, when we’ve experienced better? Radical acceptance is a good place to start.
Radical acceptance is essentially the beginning of the serenity prayer. “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.” It’s the decision to accept a current circumstance for what it is and to resist the urge to dwell on unhelpful thoughts—thoughts such as “This isn’t fair” or “This shouldn’t be happening to me.” Now, this doesn’t mean we have to like hardships or stressful situations. And it certainly doesn’t mean that we lie down and allow ourselves to be steamrolled by our circumstances. It’s simply letting go of “what was” and accepting the truth of “what is.” We can’t change the past, but we can change our present. And we do so by first accepting our situation in all of its stressful, frustrating, socially distant glory. But let’s not stop there, because it’s one thing to accept that which is out of our control, and it’s quite another to be content with that which still is.
As defined above, being content is to be pleased with one’s situation. What part of your current situation is pleasing? Or, to put another way, what part of your current situation could be pleasing if given a little imagination and creativity? Eighteenth century writer Samuel Johnson said, “He who has so little knowledge of human nature as to seek happiness by changing anything but his own disposition will waste his life in fruitless efforts.” Not to be confused with twenty-first century actor Samuel Jackson who said, “Hold onto your butts.” Which, given the current pandemic, doesn’t feel like the worst advice either. But Johnson is right, we’ll find happiness—even in trying times—once we choose to change our mindset and redefine that which is pleasing.
So, try to find pleasure in the little things—a movie, a walk, a Friday night pizza. Because if we’re discontent with the blessings that we have, then the grass will always be greener on the other side.
Philippians 4:11-13
“I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength” (NIV).